Weekly Dish Blog - My Hate Letter to Mosquitoes

To those of you who love summer, I say bah humbug. What’s wrong with summer you ask? I will tell you. Getting into a car that could bake a turkey, for one. And more importantly, the mosquitoes. I loathe mosquitoes. They love me. I feel that there is a poster with my face on it wherever the darn things go at night. They plan, plot and scheme to attack me; I am sure of it.

Now, I realize that this may seem a bit extreme to some of you, but trust me, they are little devils in disguise. If you are ever outside at dusk (or any other time of day in Florida) and you don’t have a citronella candle handy, never fear, just stand by me. That’s what my husband does. For each bite he gets I get 20. No seriously. He thinks it’s soooo funny. Well you know what? It’s not!

So you think they are harmless . . . just annoying little buggers that you can shoo away? Well think again my friends. Here are some facts about these buzzing pests that you may not know:

1. They are the deadliest animals on Earth. They cause more deaths than any other animal on the planet, thanks to the fact that they carry malaria, yellow fever and a few other lovely diseases. (They also carry heartworm so keep an eye on Fido.)
2. Mosquitoes fly at speeds between 1 and 1.5 miles per hour. They’re slow compared to other flying insects, but fast enough if you ask me.
3. Only the females are blood suckers and to this, I say, what happened to sisterly love?
4. An adult mosquito may live 5-6 months.
5. Mosquitoes can detect carbon dioxide from 75 feet away. So if you want to avoid them try not to breathe.

Now, I don’t want you to think that I really hate all things summer, but let’s just say I did some yard work today and I am now nursing my wounds. On the bright side, I killed a couple. Of course on the downside of that there are about a billion to go. Maybe I’ll go outside when winter rolls around.

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